I don't know what's worse......

Ah dunnae know what's worse, thes bludy st'rm, no bludy power, almost bein' devowered by an..um....alligatur Ah believe, ur bein' mistaken fur a boy. Again. Its understandable hoo it tends tae happen a lot though. Mah Da makes me cut mah hair, bin' mah chest, dress like a boy an' talk like a boy. Back in Scootlund, there was a mob efter him when he decided tae turn on them durin' a revolution. They vowed tae kill him an' his entire fowk, so ta hide Ah have ta be a loon. Why? Coz they ur lookin' fur a fowk wi' a twin boy an' lassie, nae twin wee boys.

Some days, Ah wish Ah could be a lassie again. Mah lang hair was mah pride an' joy, mah beloved Scottish red. But now aw that's left ay that bonnie heed ay hair is th' wee bit Ah am allowed tae keep. But, if Ah were tae become a lassie again, they main fin' our fowk. Livin' in constant danger ay discovery is hard but worth it as lang as we stay alive.

That day Ah will always min'. On th' way back from th' brewery, mah eye caught sigh ay somethin' in a dark, murky foontain. A local quine stopped tae talk tae me. Ah believe she is th' bodie that treats mah dug whenever she is sick, an' runs th' clinic. 'er nam is..uhh...Anna? Probably, though mah memory tends tae git a bit hazy at times.

"I've the nerve to push you." Ah turn aroond an' say hello tae th' quine, Anna. In mah min' Ah am wonderin', now what in th' world wold a grown hen want tae push a young "boy" intae th' foontain? Hmmph, Ah suppose not all of us are graced wi' good manners.

"My name, you know it?" Well of coorse Ah do quine, Ah make it a point tae know everyone's names. Its simply polite. She also likes tae come aroond th' pub some. She asks me what Ah am lookin' at, an' Ah tell 'er Ah believe Ah saw a crocodile down there. She 'en accuses me of drinkin' mah sailor's whiskey mah Da needs fur th' pub. How rude dae Americans git?

Ah then spot th' huge beast. Without another thought, mah whiskey cask is bein' split ower th' beasts thick skull, sae as it would hurt neither of us. Ah see all of that bonnie, amber liquid spill ower th' square's cobblestones while th' beast retreats tae its murky depths. Of course she then decided tae git smart wi' me an' correct mah mistake. "Alligatur. Spines on th' back were different. Alligatur." No wonder mah Ma was hesitant on comin' tae America, th' fowk here are all rude an' in such a hurry. But, Ah decide tae still be polite.

"Artis. You're welcome Anna. Stay safe out there eh." Ah shake 'er haind an' we part ways.

The day started with...

The day started with grogginess. And no sleep, yet again. There was a drunken brawl at the Pub where I work so we all know I was the one who had to stay back and clean up the mess those foolish idiots made. Scran & Scullies has been ours since my Da moved the family here from Scotland, but it feels so much older. All the old Scots in town are very familiar with our Pub. (Secretly I think they all stick around for my AMAZING cooking rather then each other's company, the grumpy old farts). I have an apartment at The Meridian but a lot of the time I end up sleeping in the loft above the Pub due to my late and stressful nights here. Its a wonder a person can get any sleep up here at all on this brick of a mattress. Getting out of bed and downstairs was a task in itself this morning, but someone had to do it and that someone was myself. Walking down the stairs the floor shines from my thorough scrub last night, as well as the tables and the bar counter. Seeing my hard work is satisfying to me, until my older brother Callum dumps the first load of kegs onto the floor in front of the bar counter. Both of us work the bar but I am mostly in the kitchen cooking and waiting tables to get the orders from our customers.
     "Artis, can you help get the food orders?" he asks in his sweet voice. Of course I have to do it because I am the one who uses it but still, it tends to get on my nerve just a bit. Those crates tend to get heavy! Callum has complained to Da about getting more help but he always says "Callum, this is a family run business, and we are the family. You do your share and the rest of us will too." I can see where he comes from but at the same time he needs to stop being such an old, stern Scot and just let some little changes happen. His pig-headedness bothers me at times.